Learning to Fly
I started this piece, Learning to Fly, not with a specific idea in mind, but a lot of scrambled thoughts. Thoughts about God, and how my views of Him have changed over the years. Not that He’s changed, but that I have. And I haven’t, all at the same time.
I was wondering if how I viewed Him as 8 year old vs how I viewed Him as a 24 year old vs how I view Him now, is right or wrong, or if there even is a right or wrong way to view Him. I wondered how billions of believers around the world with billions of different upbringings and billions of different experiences and billions of view points see The Almighty and find common ground in Him.
And if all these people see the Creator through a completely different lense than me, then who’s Creator is the real one? Is He all things to all people? Do I have it wrong? Do they? Or are we all correct, in our own little box we’ve chosen to put Him?
Within my small corner of the world I observe so many different friends, family members, and acquaintances spilling their opinions about who and what they believe to be the one true King, and what His plans for the world are, with all the happenings going on around the globe. If they believe in Him at all, that is. And at the same time spilling their opinions about why the other persons view is incorrect. And that’s just right here in my little realm of life. What greater controversies are there among His people when it comes to the world!? How can I think the way I was brought up and my experiences and my opinions are the only ones that hold validity?! How can you, I ask?! Or do you consider it at all? Do you even question? Or care?
People may say I’m a fence rider. That I don’t pick a side, I have no opinion, so I don’t stand for anything on the matter. I say the fence is a hard damn place to be. On the one side I have the bold and the loud and the opinionated friends and family who aren’t afraid to stomp their foot and claim The Word that THEY know and interpret is the end all be all. It is what it is, end of story. And man, I covet their courage! To have an ounce of it, is admirable!
On the other side of the fence I see those asking questions and bucking the status quo, “the norm” for this Bible Belt community that I hold dear. Throwing out these gnarly and radical ideas which challenge my way of thinking and grow my naive little brain. They are so creative and vulnerable, which also takes courage! To be completely themselves, regardless of the condemnation it may attract. If only I were so brave to be the real me, all the time…it leaves me in awe!
And guess what…both sides love their friends and family fiercely and with loyalty. Sometimes, as the fence rider, I feel the pull on one arm, while a mighty jerk pulls the other. All the while, I’m trying to see and understand both sides. Their experiences and upbringings and heartaches. Some of which I can and never will know, because I’m a white, heterosexual female from north east Texas, raised southern baptist and trying my best to see other points of view and do it peacefully. That’s all. Being a peacemaker is hard. And I love both sides of this fence I’m riding.
So how could I ever expect to see God as they do? How could they ever see Him as I do? And who’s right? And who’s wrong? At times I want to throw my hands up and yell from the fence at them all! And scream to the heavens above, “show us all what it is you are, so your people will stop throwing stones over semantics and things they can’t control!”
As I wrote a prayer under this painting and I worked it out on canvas this verse whispered from the back of my mind, and slowly became louder as I put the final touches on…
“Oh child,” it said, “don’t you remember??…”
“Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.””
Isaiah 30:21
So anyway, that’s where this painting comes from. In the meantime, in between time, trust the process. We are all becoming. Would love to hear your thoughts on all this rambling. ✌🏻💖🎨🕊️🕊️🕊️
